Voicing Concerns

Posted on Thu Feb 27th, 2014 @ 6:08pm by Commodore Samantha York & Commander Alexandra Vance

1,135 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: Revenge
Location: Captain's Ready Room

ON

Alexandra watched as Master Sergeant Mangalia left York's ready room. She did not know much about this version of him but she knew the other had died, she watched it happen...

She immediately rose from her chair moving over to York's ready room simply stepping through the door without announcing her entry.

"Ghosts of the past bring bad omens Commodore, that is why they are best left in the past..." Alexandra began.

"They can also be portents for good," Sam countered. "It was bound to happen. I've met my twin twice. I'm not sure I want to make it a third time. I don't consider it a bad omen."

"Your crew didn't watch you die nor attend your funeral. You weren't the one who had to put an end to Master Sergeant Mangalia, but I am certain the one who did will not want a constant reminder of the event. You see the only thing that makes taking a life bearable, is the fact you never have to see their face again." Alexandra replied back coldly. Sam had probably never taken a life and could never understand what could transpire. Vance wondered if Sam was looking at this like some sort of second chance.

"Having him here will not bring Master Sergeant Mangalia back, he died....I would know because I watched it happen."

"No, it will not. But I'm not trying to bring Leo back. I'm also not going to condemn this man just because I came through a dimensional rift with his twin." She ran a hand through her hair in frustration. "Alexandra, I've had to kill people, too. I've watched people I care about die. And I spent years working with Leo. Do you think I don't think of him every time I see his twin? Maybe this is a chance for you to work through your own feelings about Leo and put them in their proper perspective. This is NOT our Leo. He's a different person. We can't treat him like his dead twin because he is not."

"I have no feelings nor do I have any for Master Sergeant Mangalia. He was a means to an end, a pawn, collateral damage, nothing more. This Sam is not about you or me. You think your pain is hard to cope with, try being the person on the other side of that phaser, try being the one who has to explain to the Master Sergeant that HE was responsible for his twin's death.

Pressing the trigger is the easy part Samantha, try having to explain a loss to a family member...that is the true test of courage." Alexandra said with her voice trailing off at the end. She could tell already Sam was not going to cope well. She probably didn't when she killed the last people, no doubt someone told her it was the right thing to do....

It was funny how those words warmed a person's heart and absolved guilt....the RIGHT thing....

"I'm a Starfleet Captain," Sam said quietly but firmly. "I've written my share of letters to family members informing them that their loved one is dead. It's never easy and I don't like it, but it's not a task I will shunt off to someone else. I've been responsible for the death of my crew because of my actions. Some were in the line of duty and I still don't like it. Some died because of personal choices I made and I like that even less, but I don't go around second-guessing what I did -- or why." She thought back about her time as a prisoner in the mines. If she knew then what she knew now, she'd do it again without hesitation.

"And I think you underestimate me, Alexandra. I killed two men who tried to rape me. I did it without reservation. Could I have found a way out of killing? Maybe, but I didn't look for one. It was kill or be raped and I chose to kill. I'm willing to go to great lengths for the people I love and am responsible for. I appreciate your concern, but I do know what I'm doing."

Alexandra shook her head and laughed. "You still don't get it do you. Anyone can put words to a page, but to look someone in the eye....not so easy.

You think killing your attackers makes you ready for this? That was necessity, that was survival instinct. Try doing it for no reason! Try doing it for someone else's personal gain." Alexandra's tone became increasingly passionate and angry.

She promptly and purposefully stepped towards Samantha placing herself only inches from her face staring into her eyes. "I killed fifty seven of your crew, fifty seven people whose only crime was to take a stand against me. There is no letter to erase that, to ease the guilt to mask the pain. There is only me telling you I killed fifty seven of your crew in cold blood...but I've come to terms with that.

"So here's your chance Samantha York, to put actions to your words. Right here you tell me what both of us know is true, a conclusion Leo will eventually come upon...words you must speak to him, not write...

"Tell me that my life was more valuable than Major Mangalia's."

"I can't do that," Sam said. "Nor can I tell you that it's your fault, because it isn't. You were no more responsible for their deaths than I was for sending them over to the Rhombus." She didn't back down and she didn't break eye contact. It was time Alexandra stopped taking personal responsibility for what happened when she was assimilated.

"I've come to an arrangement with my personal demons, I have to make sure the same can be said for you and the rest of this crew. Regardless of circumstance, morality, compassion if the Master Sergeant proves to be a determent to this ship or crew I will remove him myself, I can promise you that."

"I'm fine," Sam assured her XO. "I've come to terms with what I've done and the consequences. If I hadn't, I wouldn't be fit to be a Starfleet Captain. Every time I send people off the ship I run the risk they won't return. I can't let that keep me from doing what I have to. I take every precaution, but no one can predict the unexpected."

She watched Alexandra for several moments. "Does that satisfy your concerns?"

"For the time being..." Alexandra replied.

"Good enough," Sam replied. She paused for a moment, then smiled. "I appreciate your concern, Alexandra. I'm glad I can trust you to have my back."

OFF

Commodore Samantha York
Commanding Officer

Commander Alexandra Vance
Executive Officer

 

RSS Feed