Born to Hand Jive Baby...

Posted on Sat Oct 25th, 2014 @ 8:57am by Lieutenant JG Teenah Spartacus & Lieutenant Arnon Barak MD, PsyD & Lieutenant Ignatz Jones

946 words; about a 5 minute read

Mission: Deadly Diplomacy
Location: Dr. Arnon Barak's Office
Timeline: Following the Emergency Briefing

ON

"Before I was born, late one night, my papa said everything's alright
The doctor laughed when ma lay down, with her stomach bouncing all around
Cause the beebop stork was about to arrive
Mama gave birth to the hand-jive"

Arnon was listening to Sha Na Na while he waited for Chaplain Ignatz and Counselor Spartacus to arrive to get him up to speed on the situation with the delegates.

"I could barely walk when I milked a cow, when I was three, I pushed a plow
While chopping wood, I move my legs, and I started dancin' while I gathered eggs
Bowed and clapped, I was only five
And I danced 'em all, he's born to hand-jive"

Arnon was dancing around his office to the music and singing the lyrics. He was so into the music that he didn't notice his fellow officers entering his office as the song finished.

"Oh yeah, yeah, yeah - everybody

Born to hand-jive, baby, born to hand-jive, baby - yeah

How low can you go, how low can you go, how low can you go, how low can you go

Higher, higher, higher and higher
Now can you hand-jive, baby, oh can you hand-jive, baby
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, born to hand-jive, oh yeah"


The clicking of her heels were lost to the sound of the music as Spartacus entered the room, she had tried the chime but the slight echo of the music told her it was not heard. The door parted and she strode into the room, her SKirted uniform was pressed neatly, she had the black tights and boots as were the regulation, her ear rings dangled just a bit and matched the bracelete on her left wrist. In her right she had a PADD which she started to get the lyrics of the song being so enjoyed.

"Higher, higher,higher and High-er" She gave a harmony with her sweet alto voice that was a part of her training to please men.

Spartacus had the page of the music in front of her.

"Now can you 'Hand-Jive" she emphasized the words as the music denoted. "Baby, Oh can you hand-jive baby."

"Oh Yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah..." Each of them just a little more towards climax of the rythum. "Born to hand-Jive... Oh-Yeah." She belt out the last 'Oh Yeah."

She knew she had to be noticed by now and with an almost coy smile made eye contact with her Chief Counselor.

"Is this how we start all our days sir?" She mused. "I admit this could be fun, can we try jazz next round?"

Arnon turned to face Ensign Spartacus.

"Welcome!" he said, totally unashamed. "Come in, come in. Have seat!"

Spartacus went to the small sitting area and took a seat, crossing her legs in a naturally proper feminine way and had her PADD in her lap. "Thank you sir." She nod to him. "SO is this your normal way of being that I should get used to Lt. Barak?"

"Perhaps," Arnon replied. "Shame and embarrassment are not Rigelian traits after all!"

Ignatz entered after a suitable pause, not wanting to embarrass either of the two. He thought his own voice much too coarse for singing, though he enjoyed music very much. "Eh? Did I miss something?"

"Not at all, Chaplain," Arnon responded cheerfully. "Come in, come in. Have a seat!"

"I only just arrived myself Ignatz." Spartacus offered the seat beside her, it would be easier if the parties were across from one another and an odd number meant 'two up' on one side or the other. "Have a seat and make yourself comfortable." She liked having Ignatz near her as she knew him and the other is her direct command officer so it was a toss up.

The Diplomatic Corps were disgusting as an organization in her opinion yet Ignatz seemed to not have the same mentality as the score of lecherous delegates she had met in her time as 'Ambassador Arm Candy.'

Stifling a bit of a laugh,"Oh, I've been arm candy before, there are much worse things to be expected to do..."

Arnon raised an eyebrow.

"Arm candy?" he said. "Am I missing something?"

"Probably, It's alright, for some reason I am having a horrible time NOT hearing Miss Spartacus think today, I've never had that problem before, in fact, if I didn't have the Caitian in my heritage, I'd be lost half the time." Ignatz mused.

"Alright then," Arnon said. "I called this meeting so that the two of you could get me up to speed on the delegates and their issues and so that we could coordinate our efforts in dealing with them. Chaplain, since you are the ship's diplomat, perhaps you could begin?"

Ignatz gave a look like a guilty boy with his hand caught in the cookie jar. "Actually, it's all pretty silly one side wants the men in charge, the other wants the women. If you act subservient, you should be fine"

Arnon sighed.

"I should have told the Commodore I'm a counselor not a canape-passer," he said. "What do think our next move should be?"

"I'm all for suggesting to them to put a hermaphrodite in charge, but with my luck the only thing they would agree on is that neither side would be wanting that. Funnier thought would be telling them the answer is simple, that the two heads have to get married and rule jointly." Ignatz grinned at that and mused, "Either that or a physical challenge and the captain of the winning team is in charge for the next say three years?"

Arnon sighed.

TBC

 

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