Positions reversed

Posted on Tue Feb 5th, 2013 @ 1:33pm by 1st Lieutenant Kara Melo & Captain Cameron Bourne

1,062 words; about a 5 minute read

Mission: A Pirate's Life
Location: Sickbay
Timeline: After "Getting Back to it" and before "Burial at Sea"

ON:

Cam was down in sickbay, sitting beside the biobed Kara was laying on recovering. He was still feeling guilty about what he'd done, how was he supposed to be trusted to lead an entire Marine Division when he could go 'crazy' under pressure.

Closing his eyes, he tried to bury the thoughts in his mind and calm down. This was not the time for such thoughts. After a few breaths, he returned to the book he was reading

Kara woke slowly, first becoming aware that she was conscious, then she was aware that someone was in the room with her and he was radiating anxiety. She opened her eyes and blinked several times until she could focus.

Noticing movement beside him, Cam quickly stood up, "Kara? Are you alright?"

Cam. She wasn't sure how she felt about Cam being here. "I'm breathing. That's a good sign."

At this Cam smiled, "that's good to hear" he said, before his smile faded, "Kara, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean for it to go this far. I just....lost control. I hope you can forgive me" as soon as he stopped talking, Cam fell to his knees and bowed his head, "I intended to put myself forward for dissiplinary action as soon as you were up"

"Why?" she asked.

"A senior officer attacking one of his subordinates is generally frowned upon, and sometimes it can lead to a court martial"

That was true enough, but not what she wanted to know. "Why did you do it?"

"It's a defense mechanism, developed over years of war and recon missions behind enemy boarders. I've tried counciling, I've tried reprogramming, but nothing seems to work"

"Then how can you ever work with other Marines? In training or exercises?" she asked softly.

Cam shook his head, "I don't know, I had the same problem when I first retired. I saw enemies around every corner. Eventually I started feeling more than a little paranoid that people were following me. I'm not sure what happened, but somewhere along the line, I figured that getting back out there would help, and for a time it did. This was my first episode in years. Extreme form of PTSD I guess"

For several moments Kara said nothing. She really wasn't sure what to say, if she were honest. "You know, that could get someone hurt." She was trying to make light of the situation, but she was also concerned at his ability to be a Marine if he couldn't keep the lines from blurring.

Cam looked up at Kara, "you don't think I know that? You don't think that I've tried to think of some way that I can deal with this? I've thought of try everything from telepathically burying the instinct to rehab and psychological clinics. What am I supposed to do, just throw away my career?"

"If you keep going the way you are you won't HAVE a career." Now she was both attracted to and repelled by Cam. It was an awkward position to be in. What could she say to ameliorate the situation? "Have you considered a mind meld?"

Looking a bit confused, Cam stood up, "Do you think it would help? I thought Vulcans thought of Mind Melds as a very personal thing"

"Depends on the Vulcan. They can also help people forget -- if you can find one who will work with you," she said quietly. She slowly moved her leg to a more comfortable position. The bone was fixed, but she was still a little sore.

Thinking about what Kara had said, an idea suddenly struck him, "what about Betazoids? They're telepathic as well aren't they?"

"Sometimes, yes. It is inherent in the species." She was hesitant, not knowing exactly where he was going with this.

"Can Betazoids perform mind melds, or something similar"

Kara slowly raised herself onto her pillows so she wasn't just laying on the biobed. "Yes and no. Betazoids are telepaths and empaths. Vulcans are more touch telepaths. Through a mind meld they can gain an access to the mind that most Betazoids couldn't without the fear of damage. I think it's part training and part genetic ability. Why?"

"Well, I've heard that Betazoids have less social inhibitions than Vulcans do. It doesn't matter, it was just a thought" Cam said, as he leant back against the biobed behind him, "mayby talking with the ships Councilor would be a good idea"

"Social inhibitions, yes, but it's a very intimate process. Most non-telepaths are uncomfortable with it. You can't hide behind your thoughts and feelings. Vulcans can probe your mind and slip out again. It's both more invasive and less intimate. Does that make sense?" she asked. She was Betazoid herself and had never tried to use her telepathy with anyone who wasn't also a telepath.

Cam nodded. He didn't fully understand the nuances of Telepathy or its uses, but he understood what Kara was basically saying. If he chose to go ahead with telepathicly burying his memories, he wouldn't be able to hide the questionable and sometimes despicable actions during the Dominion War. This was something to think about.

His 'blood rage', as he called it, had served him well in the War and in the Mines, but now he was back onboard a Starfleet ship and in a position of responsibility. He had to get his darker side back under control. Giving a sigh, Cam looked up at Kara, "do you know anyone who'd be willing to help me?"

Kara settled back on her pillows. "I don't know, Cam. I'm Betazoid, but I don't know what I can do about altering memories. D'Rian is in Bravo. She's Vulcan. You might ask her."

Cam sat there for a moment in silence, he wasn't sure about what to do. After a while, he stood up, "I'll have to think about it. Get better soon" he said before quickly turning around and walking out of sickbay

Kara wasn't sure what to think of that conversation. On the one hand, she wished she could do more to help Cam. On the other, she wasn't sure if even a Vulcan could help him. She closed her eyes and sighed. Whatever he decided, she hoped he'd let her know.

OFF:

Warrant Officer Cameron Bourne
Marine CO
USS Calypso

Staff Sergeant Kara Melo
Alpha Platoon Leader
USS Calypso

 

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